More Quirky Doodles and Grief

I am still in a state of grief and denial over the loss of my mama last month. I can't seem to unlock my insides to want to do anything that I don't HAVE to do. But I am slowly beginning to want to do art again by doing my quirky doodle sketches. I feel a freedom doing them, because the marks tell me what, or who, they want to be, and I let my pencil follow the lines to let them come forth. I don't worry about them being "perfect", and I love their quirkiness! Each one tells a story of some kind, sometimes loudly, and sometimes quietly, but it's there.

At night my head is filled with thoughts of mama's illness and passing, and I have trouble sleeping. This morning I woke up at 5 a.m. and couldn't go back to sleep, so I got up, went to the bathroom, crept into the kitchen, got a banana and my Kindle, and crept back to bed, where I sketched for a while. These are what came forth. I added a little color to the background with photo editing, just for a little variety.

I love the characters of the ladies that step out of the marks, and I could write a short story about each of them! I may do that at some point, and publish a book of short stories with my own illustrations!

Cats are a pretty common theme. I guess it's because we have some!

Love this lady! Her expression reminds me of a young cousin and our great niece, who often make these lips in their selfies. She looks like someone fun with her bird and scarf!

Another Koi fish? I love them and think they're beautiful, but I don't know why they're swimming around in my marks and mind. 

A rare sketch of fruit, grapes and a peach on a checkered tablecloth. Don't know where that came from either, unless it's because eating and sleeping is how I've been dealing with the grief over mama, but also a dear older cousin that we lost in March, whom I considered my older sister.

It's been a hard four months for us, and it will take time for us to heal. Hubby and I are not young any more either, and not in the best of health, but still very blessed.

After my doodling, I read a few of Kahlil Gibran's writings from a Kindle book that I had bought some time ago. I was introduced to him by my Literature teacher, Jack Anderson, who also became a friend, when I went to community college at age 47, the same year I lost my little 16 year old pekingese, Kibbles Marie. His writing is very thought provoking and somehow soothing.

I went back to sleep for a while, sleeping much later than I meant to, but that's ok. I have laundry going, we've had breakfast, and hubby has the 1945 version of The Picture of Dorian Grey on. It's too hot to be outside anyway. All we need is a bowl of popcorn! :)

I will tell you that I've been looking at tea bag art and bullet journaling, so don't be surprised if my attempts at that pop up on here...

Do something creative every day, even if it's only five minutes! It's good for your soul!